Saturday, October 28, 2006
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I have set this blog up for those who know me, if you find my blog interesting for other reasons feel free to keep reading, but I fear my life is boring. You can contact me by e-mail, try blogging.pete at thefreemans dot me dot uk Obviously you will have to swap in some @ and . where needed, I'm not sticking my e-mail address out here for everyone to see.
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My solicitors and God joke:
An engineer dies and as an atheist goes to Hell. Looking around the miserable place of the Damned he remarks to Satan that Hell doesn't need to be so bad. "What do you mean?" asks Old Nick. "Well, I'm an engineer - I could fix this place up if you agree to stop torturing everyone."
Satan isn't any happier with living in Hell either, so he readily agrees. Within months the engineer is making huge progress with a team supplied to him. Airconditioning is added, escalators, pools and other enjoyable amenities. Soon Hell is a pretty nice place. This news trickles Upstairs and soon God is calling Satan on the hotline.
"What's going on, Nick? Hell is supposed to be a place of eternal suffering, not a nice place. Get it back the way it was or else!" thunders the loving God.
"Bugger off, beard-face!" retorts Old Nick, "I've lived in this shithole for millennia, now at last I have a nice place and I ain't changing it for you and your hosanna crew."
"Look, Nick, you know this constitutes a breach of your eternal contract. Do you want to force me to call in the lawyers?" threatens God.
Satan laughs his arse off: "Where the fuck are YOU going to find a lawyer???"
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